Envy, Anxiety, and the Art of Refocusing

 

Comedian Jerry Seinfeld once said:

“All this anxious overthinking and concern about how people view me — someone said something bad about me, and you get so upset about it — is wasted time and energy.

Your only focus should be on getting better at what you’re doing. Focus on what you are doing. Get better at what you are doing. Everything else is a waste of time.”

It’s a simple but powerful idea — and it doesn’t just apply when people say things about you.

But what about the other side?

What about when you’re the one imagining or saying bad things about someone else — not because they’ve wronged you, but because their name keeps coming up in praise? Because your friends or colleagues speak highly of them? Because they’ve succeeded at something you secretly wished you had?

That, too, is wasted energy.

Envy, like anxiety, jealousy, and insecurity, is natural. It’s baked into the human experience. But just because it’s natural doesn’t mean we should feed it. The best we can do is learn how to disarm these negative, energy-draining emotions.

The trick isn’t to pretend they don’t exist, but to starve them of our attention.

We remind ourselves:

“Our focus should be on getting better at what we are doing. Concentrate on what we are doing. Practice what we are doing. Everything else is a waste of time.”

Because whether it’s fear of judgment or the quiet pull of envy, the cure is often the same:

Refocus. Return to your work. Sharpen your blade.

Cancelo Alvarez